TROMEO QUE-(Will Keenan) Romantic young man searching for true love. Hangs out with some weird people.
JULIET CAPULET-(Jane Jensen) Bisexual innocent vegetarian. Being forced to marry against her will.
MONTY QUE-(Earl McKoy) Tromeo's poor, alcoholic dad. Farts a lot but loves his son.
CAP CAPULET-(Maximillian Shaun) Juliet's dad and a rich bastard. I can't begin to say how demented this man is.
BENNY CUE-(Stephen Blackehart) Pierced cousin of Tromeo. Smart guy but weird looking.
MURRAY MARTINI-(Valentine Miele) Tromeo's buddy. A smart ass with more than one screw loose. (BAD MONKEY!)
SAMMY CAPULET-(Sean Gunn) Juliet's cousin. A sick weird guy with lots of emotional problems. Tries to nail his sister.
TYRONE CAPULET-(Patrick Connor) Juliet's cousin. Hostile beefy guy with a Hitler head billy club. Out to kill Tromeo.
LONDON ARBUCKLE-(Steve Gibbons) Wants to marry Juliet. Into self mutilation and meat products. A bit unstable.
NESS-(Debbie Rochon) Capulet family cook. Having a lesbian affair with Juliet. More than likely sets off metal detectors.

LEMMY-Our narrator. Motorhead front man turned Shakespearean actor (well i use that term very loosely)

Our pals at Troma have done it again. The first time I got finished watching this movie I had to start the DVD over and watch it again. Tromeo & Juliet is becoming a cult classic just like the Toxic Avenger did back in '85. My wife, who dislikes Troma and other B-Movies, even likes this one. Some of our friends, who are also not B-Movie fans, can be heard saying "Murray was a fag!", "Bad Monkey!" and other notable Tromeo and Juliet quotes. The Unrated Director's Cut DVD of this film is a must for any B-Movie enthusiast, but it does help to own a DVD player to play it on.

Lemmy introduces the two houses, Cue & Capulet, who have been feuding for the past twenty or so years. Your typical fued stuff: dead park animals, cut off fingers, fistfights and the occasional shooting. We find out, in a very sick way, that Tromeo is really searching for true love. Now Lloyd Kaufman is a brilliant director but intermixing a lesbian sex scene and Tromeo masturbating is just wrong.

Since Murray cuts off Sammy's fingers, Cap, Sammy, Monty & Benny are brought in for quetioning but the police don't get very far since Sammy won't say what happened to him. Once outside Cap confronts Monty and Sammy is stupid enough to stick his head into the car window. Benny rolls up the car window trapping Sammy's head and drives off. Punching Sammy in the face while going around 60 MPH is a good way to get him loose, but being freed from the car flings him head first into a fire hydrant. After a futle attempt to put a piece of his brain back in his head Sammy dies.

When Tromeo and Murray crash a capulet costume party the fertilizer hits the fan. Tromeo and Murray go with the intention of wrecking the party and stealing from the capulets, But Tromeo sways from the plan when he meets Juliet. After dancing Tromeo & Juliet fall instantly in love (complete with "boing" erection sound effects). The lovers bliss is broken up by Tyrone who lets them know just who they've fallen in love with. After a not so heroic escape, Juliet dreams of a visit from Tromeo and having a C Section birth of popcorn, rats and maggots (Maybe it's better if you don't understand it). Juliet wakes up screaming and is put in the "Time Out Room", a plexiglass box in a dark room.

Tromeo breaks into the Capulet house and finds Juiet chained in the box, since she can't escape the chain they have sex instead. Juliet tells Tromeo of her impending marriage to London and they decide to get married instead. After a meeting with Father Lawrence Tromeo and Juliet secretly marry, and have a honeymoon seeing the sights of New York city. After matching tattoos, porno theaters and sex on the side of a museum they say goodnight.

Benny and Murray are confronted by Tyrone, who is looking for Tromeo. Once Tromeo shows up some words are exchanged and a fight breaks out. One of Benny's customers is stabbed in the eye with a tattoo needle and Murray has Tyrone's Hitler Club imbedded in his skull. Murray asks Tromeo to kiss him goodbye as he's dying, which leads to one of my favorite quotes in the movie "Murray was a fag!". (Not a very significant line but it's really funny the way he says it.) Tromeo and Benny go after Tyrone and his buddies and aother fight breaks out. Tromeo throws Tyrone onto a car and when the car stops he is decapitated. Tyrone's head lands on a different car with a wholesome looking family and causes an accident. The police get involved and one of the capulets finger Tromeo. Wanted for murder Tromeo goes into hiding at Father Lawrence's church and Juliet meets up with him.

Father Lawrence sends Juliet to Fu Chang, a drug pusher that can give her a magic potion. Juliet uses the potion to make herself a cow faced freak, to scare away London. Once London jumps out a window, Cap confronts his daughter and is going to kill her. Tromeo jumps in and a very demented fight results. Cap is killed and Father Lawrence convinces the police that the two killings were self defense.

Tromeo and Juliet go outside and are stopped by Juliet's mom and Tromeo's dad. That Tromeo's real father is Cap and that he can't be with Juliet because they are brother and sister. One great line is when Monty tells Tromeo, "...perhaps you haven't noticed but I'm BLACK". Tromeo and Juliet decide that they're going to be together anyway and drive off. Six years later in Tromeo and Juliet have a house in Tromaville, New Jersy and have three slightly mutated kids. The End.

The credits are almost as funny as the movie. Various joke credits and messages from the credit writer.

The Unrated Director's Cut DVD of this one is CRAMMED full of cool features. Interviews, director's dommentary, a special welcome from Lloyd Kaufman, deleted scenes, a virtual tour of the Troma Inc. building, and a whole bunch more stuff. Worth the money if you are into Troma.

This film is plagued by some particularly bad special effects, and it wouldn't be a Troma film without them.

I own the same crossbow that Cap Capulet uses. I got it for $25 at SportMart. Think a rich guy like that would buy a really good one. But the exploding bolts for it must be expensive so maybe it balances out.

What the hell is wrong with Sammy? What could make him act like such a tard?

I would love to be in a Troma movie.